Day 59

Shelter in Place Day 59

Last night we watched The Last Jedi and I lost it halfway through the movie. There was so much death and the First Order was winning. I seriously had those ugly cries that you get when you watch an emotional movie. I kept saying, I hate all this death and it hit me. I turned to The Husbear and said, “It’s like what’s happening now, and I think I’m just more emotional because of so many people dying. 

I discovered a friend from work had lost her grandmother and the grandmother’s sister. It was in the middle of a chat with several people and I’d just said how I’d finished a short story and had 35k on my third book and just as that posted, her post of the loss of her family and I felt like my cheering me was so much less than what she was going through. And she went on and cheered me. And I felt like such a shit. 

I’m scared for what all this death is doing to us. There are people who just don’t seem to get it. Thankfully, the majority of my friends and family are still doing well and following rules, but how much longer can this go on? LA County just announced they were not opening anytime soon. My wrist surgery will be postponed to at least August. 

Last night I posted how there has been an uptick of people getting Covid19 from those protests a couple of weeks ago. 581 people in Anaheim have it and Santa Ana has 586, and Huntington Beach with 272 and the numbers go down from there, but not much throughout all of the OC. With 80 deaths. 

The Husbear kept telling me that this was act two of the trilogy, and I understand, but it was still so much death. Please, #Staythefuckhome #pleasewash #pleasewearamask You can wear underwear, you can wear a mask. 

If you’ve lost family members, my heart goes out to you. I know you must be tired of me talking about the same things over and over, but it’s how I’m processing things. I need to hear from friends and family.

So, check in. How are you holding up?

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